West Coast Heat Wave?!

How do I beat the heat on this sweltering summer day? I am six months pregnant and not used to the heat at all. I live in the Pacific Northwest and I enjoy it's grey and drizzling days just fine thank you. Today is about 85 degrees and there is seemingly no relief. So how do I beat the heat and not loose my mind completely?

First, I knew this was coming. Yesterday was really hot too. Yesterday I went to my grandma's for the day to visit with family, as my husband Paul was in Seattle for two days for a progressive rock festival. SeaProg. So before I left the house, off to Grandma's, I hung up the heavy curtains on all the windows and closed up everything. The idea is, that if you house is well insulated enough, by closing windows and shuttering you'll be locking in the cool air from the night before inside and locking out all the hot air. Turns out, my house is not well insulated.

I  got home after a hot, hour long drive. It was already after 9pm and was starting to cool down outside. I was greeted by my big panting dogs when I drove up. They had been laying out in the cool grass. They followed me to my front door, eager to go inside with me. As I opened the door, a huge rush of hot stuffy air came rushing out. My dog Louie, who is completely blind, was standing at my feet ready to be the first one in. After I opened the door to the oven inside Louie sqinted through the blast of hot air and took a few steps backward before turning around and high-tailing it out of there. Smart fella.

I threw the door all the way open and pushed forward against the thick stale air. Swimming through until I could get to the next window. I opened window after window and strategically placed fans in front of a few before getting the hell out of there. I sat in the cool grass with my big stinky dogs. I figured they knew what they were doing. After about 10pm the house seemed safe to enter, there was a breeze and fresh air and the temperature was dropping.

So today, being home all day I planned ahead. I would not survive in my own home if there was a repeat of yesterday. The plan was to leave windows open as long as there were in a shaded area of the house. No cooking inside, not even the fricken toaster and load the fridge with bottles of water. Also, any cleaning or laundry needs to be done as early as possible.

I started the morning with laundry at about 8am after sleeping in later than I usually do. Then I left for the grocery store at about 10am with a very specific meal in mind. I shopped that produce section and made away like a bandit. I got fresh strawberry's, blueberry's and raspberry's. I got bananas and apples. Those were all for later. The big plan was to make something really refreshing. Something that a pregnant lady could enjoy. A hot day can easily be beat by getting drunk and going to float the river, or getting drunk and going to the water slides. Or just getting drunk and passing out somewhere, hopefully in a shaded area but not necessary. So although I cannot sedate myself today, I have a trick or two. I will make gazpacho!

Not just any gazpacho, Cucumber Avocado Gazpacho. Delicious, cold and refreshing and no cooking required. Here's my recipe, give it a try:
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Cucumber Avocado Gazpacho

Active time: 25 min

Ingredients

• 3 English cucumbers (2 lb total), peeled
• 2 Haas avocados
• 1 small zucchini
• 1 yellow bell peppers, cut into 1/4-inch dice
• 1 fresh jalapeno chilies, seeded and minced
• 2 large garlic clove, minced
• 4 green onions
• juice of 1 lime, about 1/4 cup
• 3/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro
• 1/2 cup chopped fresh parsley
• 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
• 1 teaspoon salt
• sour cream (to garnish)

Preparation

Seed cucumbers and put seeds in a blender with garlic, green onion, parsley, cilantro, jalapeno, lime juice and bell pepper. Cut cucumbers into 1/4-inch dice and combine with bell peppers and zucchini in a large bowl. Move about 1/4 of the diced veggies into the blender. Dice 1/2 avocado and add to bowl. Scoop out remaining 1 1/2 avocados into blender. Add water, salt and pepper and blend until smooth. Add more water to get a creamy but soupy consistency.

Return puree to bowl and stir. Refrigerate for a least a few hours. Dish is best served the next day, that's why this recipe makes a lot!

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Okay, so gazpacho is made and in the fridge. I also made a batch of pico de gallo since I was already chopping veggies. I cleaned and cut up my strawberries and it is just after 1:00. My laundry is done and I am officially sweaty! Next step, that cold refreshing beer... I mean shower! A cold refreshing shower!

Take a cold shower, as cold as you can stand, then turn the water way way colder. You're body with thank you later. After that frigid shower, your house should seem tolerable, mine did. I lay down on bed bed and took a nice, naked nap in front of the fan. Too modest for a naked nap? Or too many people bothering you? Try to stay as naked as possible and have all the shades drawn and lights off.

When I woke up it was just like I had passed out in the kiddie pool at the water slides, only no hangover! Winning! I was very hungry too, just like if I'd drank a bunch of beer and passed out in the kiddie pool at the water slides with a hang over. Being pregnant is weird. So to the fridge for some ice water and gazpacho!

After some work and organization, a frigid shower, a two hour nap and a meal it is 5pm. By my calculations it should be cooling off and I should be in the clear. I was wrong. It is 80 degrees! Nooo! I guess I'll have to repeat a few steps. Maybe another cold rinse off in the shower and some more ice water and gazpacho later. Also more sleeping. That is the key.

So what if it's 112 in Arizona right now. It's 80 here and I am not used to it. I know it could be hotter, but I live here for a reason and the reason is 65 degree summers. So, each man's struggle is his own.

22 Weeks

Last Thursday, day 1 of my 22nd week I woke up to the sound of the ocean. It was the last day of our mini vacation to La Push. That seems like a decade ago now. After Friday back to work, then a weekend and two more days of work. Working. We have to do it. Sometimes I even like it. This week, not so much.

I have struggled with high blood pressure since a pretty young age. It runs in my family. Not too mention some excess weight, less than perfect exercise routine and some bad habits that include salt, alcohol and cigarettes. I was put on blood pressure medication and diagnosed with chronic hypertension at the age of 22.

Years later, with better diet and the absence of alcohol and cigarettes altogether, I still wasn't able to control my hypertension without medication. My numbers were lower, but just not low enough. Nice try but no dice. Stupid genetics. Oh, well. At least I am trying. Quitting the drink and smoke wasn't going to hurt me anyway. Now I'm much more ladylike and dainty. Ha!

So when we decided to go off the pill and see if rubbing our parts together could make a tiny human, I made a doctors appointment. I wanted to know how pregnancy would effect my blood pressure and my current medication. I also wanted to know how my blood pressure and current medication could effect my pregnancy. Smart choice. The doctor switched me to a different prescription that I could take through pregnancy. My wonderful doctor also explained that many women have a drop in blood pressure in the first trimester due to increased blood volume and some other factors. So we'd need to watch to make sure it didn't go to low. Into the third trimester it is common for it to rise again, even for people with normal blood pressure to begin with. The more you know.

Friday morning when I woke up in my own bed for the first time in a few days after getting back from our vacation on the coast, my blood pressure was 110/67 before taking my morning medication. That is unusually low for me, but very good. Not too low by any means. That number would actually be ideal. That night, when I got home from a stressful day of making up for three days off. I redid all the work that was done incorrectly while I was gone, on top of an unusually busy day anyway, by blood pressure was 157/87. Not so good. Not good at all. Too high. I took my medication as scheduled, but I think I learned something very important. Stress effects my blood pressure. Probably more than I would like to admit.

What does all this mean for the baby? Well, I should calm down. Kidding, no really I should but...
As long as I'm controlling my BP with medication things are good. Pre-eclampsia is slightly more common among women that have preexisting hypertension, but not guaranteed. I need to take it easy when my numbers are high, I need moderate exercise when my numbers are good and I need to always remember to take my pills. The rest is just watch and wait.

I've read about women needing to be hospitalized or induced because their blood pressure is high. That is horrifying. I want to work and stay active right up until I'm crowning for god's sake! Please don't strap me to a bed. Worrying about the possibility of that will surely cause stress which will surely raise my blood pressure. So I'll knock that off right now. All I can do is what is in my control, the rest is just hope for the best.

Road Trip!

Cape Flattery view point.

We took a trip! No, not that kind. Stupid hippies. We took a road trip! It was a new kind of adventure that involved more bathroom stops and snacks than any road trip before. Yay pregnancy!

My husband Paul and I packed up the car and headed out to the coast with our dog, Snorp. The drive was long but it was overcast so it stayed pretty cool out and we made a lot of stops. The first stop was the Coopville ferry. Walking stairs on a moving boat was a strange sensation with my already off center of balance. I took my time and used the hand rail. We used the boat ride to stretch our legs and check out the scenery.

When we arrived at our destination, a small A frame cabin in La Push, WA, we unloaded the car and walked to the beach. It was awesome! I've never seen such waves on the Washington coast before. This was my first time in La Push, Paul had been there once before, along with Snorp the dog. Walking in the sand looking at drift wood and trying to get Snrop to go into the water (it didn't work, read more about our trip and our dog HERE). Good times.

Back at the cabin, changes were a-brewing deep within my body. This baby boy is growing. After a long car ride and a lot of walking lulling him to sleep, he was awake and more active than ever. The soft swimming sensation I've been having for the last month or so was replaced by jolts and kicks like I've never felt before. It was almost as if I was having quick, sharp muscle spasms in my lower abdomen.  Deep down inside.

After a good nights sleep we took another long drive the next day. We headed to the most northwest point of the contiguous United States. Sounds neat. Neah Bay. Through the Makah Reservation and out to Cape Flattery's trail head. It was raining of course. So we got the full northwest experience. We hiked down a long trail with several handmade boardwalks elevating us above the soggy ground. Nearly a mile of walking and we arrived at the Cape Flattery look out. It was so worth the walk. Amazing view. The walk back up was definately more exhausting. I just took my time, paced myself and we made it back okay. Alright, so Paul helped my pace myself and helped me so I didn't slip. What a gentlemen.

A nice drive back to the cabin, walks on the beach and another good nights sleep and we were ready to head home. Already! Okay, I guess so. We took the long way home and it was nice to have a change of scerery from the ride down. I felt pretty accomplished with all the walking I did. I also was proud that I didn't let my pregnancy hold me back from doing anytihng that I wanted to do. Except maybe having a beer but who cares.

I don't look pregnant, I'm just big boned.

I don't look pregnant, I'm just big boned.

Lately I've been thinking I don't look like I'm twenty weeks along. My cantelope sized uterus is neatly nesseled in my big body under layers of muscle, fat and skin. Is it possible that I will never have the adorable, bulbous belly that I see on cute mommy's to be at the grocery store? Just my usual jelly roll? Or is it just me and my distorted view of my self? Do I look pregnant afterall? Does it even matter? No. It doesn't. But somehow that doesn't stop me from wondering.

Clothes are not comfortable. I want to wear pants, but I haven't been successful in finding any that fits me comfortably. I'll be honest, I haven't tried that hard. I hate shopping and I hate trying on clothes. Meh. Today, a new reality dawned on me. Maybe I will have to buy maternity clothes. I've gotten this far by buying 3 dresses from the plus sized section at Target after I first found out I was pregnant. I also have a million pair of leggings. Okay not a million, but four. My thinking was that I could wear theses dresses now while they are oversized and I can grow into them. I also thought, leggings, they are stretchy tights. They couldn't possible be too small for me, ever. I am wrong. I didn't understand how my body would be changing.

Today I was wearing one of the dresses I mentioned. Very comfortable. I always wear an undershirt. A stretchy tank top. I have a lot of them because it's something I wear everyday. An extention of my underwear and bra onsamble. TMI? I don't really know why I do. I guess I'm just modest and overly cautious. "What if my clothes suddenly shredded to peices or desinigrated!? At least I'll have this tank top on." So today I realized that my idea of a stretchy tank top and leggings that will always fit me was wrong. Under my dress, secretly, my tank top began to roll up as my leggings would roll down. By time I went to my first bathroom break of the day I lifted my dress to find my pregnant belly completely exposed. My leggings below my belly and my shirt rolled up under my boobs. Okay. So maybe these are a little tight for me now.

So if I want my underclothes to stay in place, I think I'll need to get a size or two bigger. Better yet I would get some that have extra fabric in the belly area. Oh, you mean maternity clothes? Noooooo!

Gender Day, 20 Weeks

Baby's profile, left side.

The big 20 weeks ultrasound day came and went, and it went well! We saw our fuzzy, grainy black and white baby wiggling around and flipping back and forth. We also saw them in every imaginable (and unimaginable) angle and form. Stretched out, tucking their limbs beneath them, lying on their stomach, side, back and even shoving their butt right in the camera. Butt jokes already. Nice.

There was lots of shots taken by the ultrasound tech that I couldn't not decipher. Measurements were taken of the head, the spine, feet, hands, arms and legs. She guessed baby was about 12 ounces now. She took photos of baby's face, checking the nose and mouth for the absence of cleft palat. Everything was good. The heart has four chambers, the diaphragm is forming, the baby is swallowing and practicing breathing the way they should. Our little person is growing into a real baby and that is what matters. The most important thing this ultrasound revealed is the fact that we have a healthy human growing inside of me.

They baby is healthy and we are happy about our upcoming adventure in parenthood. This is why we have decided to keep the gender a secret. I know it's not important. KIDDING. It's a boy. Awesome, right!? We are so excited. I think Paul was happy that the lights were so dim in the ultrasound room so no one could see his 'watery' eyes. I love him. I told him that is why they keep the room dark, so the dad's don't look like wussies in front on their wives and the office staff. Kidding again. I did tell him that, but he knew I was just trying to make him laugh.

Butt, legs and wiener!!

So looking back, I think I did know I was carrying a boy. That was my very first gut feeling. Everything after that was me over thinking something that couldn't actually be determined by reason, research or knowledge. I thought it was a boy. Then I thought, no, I probably only think that because I want a boy. It's probably a girl. If it's a girl that will be tough for me. Like my mother always said when I was being bratty. "Someday you'll have a daughter that is just like you, you'll see." Oh. Shit. Could I have a daughter just like me? Oh, for the love of God. Scary.

For the record, my mother was hoping we were having a girl. Still hoping for her revenge.

So for the last 4 plus months I have been mentally preparing myself for having a girl, even though my gut told me I was having a boy. I picked out girl names, thought of girlie mommy child scenarios and pictured stupid girlie pink Disney princess nightmare clothes and decor. So what now? It's going to take a few days to get used to calling 'it' a 'he'. and we are happy!

When baby revealed the gender I think we were so happy just to know them a little better than the moment before. I think both my husband and I would have had the same ecstatic and emotional reaction if they would have told us the baby was a girl. Just that much closer to know this person we have created felt amazing. Thank you modern science.

So now what? Now I imagine life with a son. I picture all the things I wasn't allowing myself to before when I was thinking it was a girl. The coolest part is now Paul and I can get serious about picking out a name. I guess I'll have to put my favorite girl name, Louise, on the back burner. I'll save it for if I'm ever pregnant with my mother's revenge.

Little Donny Dreams

Tomorrow is the big day. The day we've all been waiting for. We couldn't be more excited. It is ultrasound day and the 20 week mark. The halfway point. Five months along. This is really going by faster than I expected.

The dreams I've been having are strange to say the least. I spent last night searching through a giant Walmart/Costco hybrid with ceilings as high as the sky. Just trying to find some low-sodium chicken flavored top ramen while strangers stop me and ask me unrelated questions that I don't know how to answer. My dreams are so bonkers. I know they don't mean anything. They are just my brain exercising, working things out. That is why when I'm having baby dreams, I don't think they are some sign that is telling me the baby's gender.

The other night I had a dream we had the baby. I was carrying baby around and suddenly it dawned on me, hey the baby is here, I don't have to wait for the ultrasound to find out the gender. (Makes perfect sense, right?) So I know it's time for a diaper change anyway and I call Paul over to look and see if they're a boy or a girl. I take off the diaper and Paul says "It's a girl!" I look closely and correct him, no it's a boy. I point at the tiniest, most microscopic mosquito sized penis. We both smile that we have a healthy boy. I move the baby to the couch onto a changing blanket to put on a new diaper. Suddenly that penis is a huge man sized one. It stretches from baby's groin past his chin. No denying the gender any longer.

I wondered to myself how I didn't notice this before. I was kind of frightened by it really. Then it dawned on me. How the hell am I going to put a diaper over this thing? What will I tell my family! Oh my god that thing has veins the size of night crawlers! What do I do now that I have a Little Donny on my hands. Oh, boy. Once the diaper was in place everything seemed normal. I remember dreading the thought of the next diaper change before I woke up.

Watch Little Donny Sketch Click that link to watch the hilarious sketch from the Upright Citizen Brigade Show.

So, needless to say I don't believe I'm psychic. At least I hope not. I wouldn't mind a boy but I hope he doesn't have elephantitis of the penis. Only time will tell.

Now, it's the final countdown to ultrasound time. It's like Christmas eve. I just want to go to sleep so it will get here faster.

19 Weeks and Wiggling

Our heads on others bodies. Defend my watermelon

May 23rd, 2013. 19 weeks and also my monthly appointment today. Nothing too exciting. The highlight was hearing the baby's heartbeat. Heart rate was 142.

We've got a wiggler. I feel it now. I'm sure of it. I have felt something for about 2 weeks, but I thought I could pass it off as my imagination. This I cannot. That baby is wiggling. Only one more week until we get to see my insides again and see what that baby is doing in there.

"Is it a boy or a lady, I don't know which?"
Besides the raging heartburn, this is a very exciting time. Nearing 20 weeks, the half way point to delivery and learning more about our baby everyday. I've definitely had a growth spurt in the last few weeks and I'm officially feeling pregnant. I kept telling myself that I don't look pregnant because I'm already so big. This morning while I was looking in the mirror I realized I can't lie to myself any longer. I do look like a woman, and I do look pregnant. Accept it and enjoy it!

Last night, I lay down and put my husbands hand on my stomach. I told Paul the baby was moving around a lot. First he said he could feel my heart beat in my stomach. Yup, that's the amazing new organ I just built, my placenta. It brings blood, oxygen and nutrients to our baby. Pretty sweet. Then he said "whoa, was that it!?", right after I felt a bit of movement. "YES!"

Paul said it felt like knocking. Maybe our baby already has a hilarious sense of humor like their very own parents and was performing their first knock-knock joke.

Baby: Knock knock
Us: Who's there?
Baby: Fetus
Us: Fetus who?
Baby: Fetus says were you raised in a barn? Close your legs, there's a draft in here and I'm cold!

Oh baby, you ARE hilarious.